Our Vows

May 31, 2009

Ecclesiastes chapter 3 verse 1 says, “To everything there is a season, and a time for every purpose under heaven.” God has chosen this time to join together Joseph and Renee so that they may share the rest of their natural lives.

As we stand before God, friends, and family, Joseph & Renee make public their commitment to one another. They wish to make it known that they recognize God’s authority over their lives which is exercised from His loving heart. 

I Corinthians 13 verses 4-7 tell us, “Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; ⁵ does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; ⁶ does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; ⁷ bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.” I John 4 verse 16 declares, “God is love, and he who abides in love abides in God, and God in him.”

Today we celebrate and share in the glorious act by which Joseph’s and Renee’s love for each other is converted into the holy and sacred bonds of marriage.

Will you please, as an expression that your hearts are united in love, now join hands.

Joseph, do you take Renee to be your wedded wife, to live together in marriage, do you promise to love her, comfort her, honor her, keep her, for better or worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health and forsaking all others, be faithful only to her, so long as you both shall live?

(I do.)

The ring please. (Joseph places ring on Renee’s left hand.)

Renee, do you take Joseph to be your wedded husband, to live together in marriage, do you promise to love him, comfort him, honor him, keep him, for better or worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health and forsaking all others,  be faithful only to him, so long as you both shall live?

(I do.)

The ring please. (Renee places ring on Joseph’s left hand.)

As you have now each vowed to the other your lifelong commitment, love, and devotion, and have exchanged rings as symbols of that commitment, I now pronounce you husband and wife. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate.

(we kiss)

Ladies and Gentlemen, I present to you Mr. And Mrs. Joseph Archer.

Do You, Do You, I Pronounce You

May 31, 2009

Joe and I are married now! Today is the first day of the rest of our lives. Together.

The wedding was simple. The day was hot but the park was beautiful with roses in pink, red, yellow, orange. The cake, lemon with raspberry filling, was delicious. All our close friends and family were there. After five months of planning it all came together.

Tomorrow we head west to the Grand Canyon for our honeymoon. But for now we’re relaxing on the couch in our home, amidst all the gifts, cards, and leftover cake. I’m exhausted. Pachelbel’s Canon in D and Josh Groban’s When You Say You Love Me swirl in my head…..

February 3.  I’ve been looking at dresses. I don’t intend to wear white; heck, we’ve both been married before so I just want it to be pretty and comfortable and casual. Right now I’m leaning toward magenta and ivy-green. The guys won’t wear ties; probably just polo shirts and nice slacks. Not going to throw the bouquet, toss the garter, or have the official ‘going-away.’ I want to just relax and enjoy the reception and take time to visit with the guests this time!

 
Right now the issue is becoming MONEY. EXPENSES.  Joe is concerned about the costs of the wedding plus a honeymoon (I want to go on a cruise). Location rental, food, photography, flowers, minister, clothing… D’ye think $2,000 ought to cover it?! Oh, and a cruise would be $200-$300 each, plus the flight to get to the port. That’s over $1,000 right there. But, you know what? I am about to pay off one of my credit bills (FINALLY!! I am NOT getting caught up in the credit trap ever again!!!!) and that will free up quite a bit of my monthly income, plus I’ll have my tax refund. If each of us pay half, we should be able to do this fairly easily.

February 23. I told Elaine that if she can make it out here, I’d be thrilled if she’d do the reception. Of course I would help out with her travel costs in return. She said she was definitely coming, but wasn’t sure how well she could manage to be too much in charge of anything right now. She was very honored that I thought she would do a decent job – and she was sure she would--but was afraid it would take more planning than she could do long distance.

I told her I had the already menu picked out, if that helps…. She did a beautiful job with Sabrina’s reception, so I have no doubt she’d do well with mine. She promised that they’d all (my sisters) help as much as possible with set up and being sure everything is how I wanted it.

My friend Sheila (who is currently unemployed, or maybe I should say semi-employed since she is doing some work out of her home) has offered to help, and she is the type who has the personality and the connections to do this type of thing. So we’ve been emailing back & forth about the plans for several weeks. I can see if she knows a good, reasonable caterer. The park does have a senior center for the reception, but I’d like to have it outdoors if at all possible.

I don’t want anything big or fancy; we might have 30 people there, even if the whole family shows up! Hobby Lobby has a lot of wedding stuff; Sheila said that Williams (grocery store) does good wedding cakes and would be reasonable.

As for the honeymoon, we’re talking about a Bahama cruise, although nothing is set in stone. Joe is retired from the Navy and has sailed around the world twice, so a cruise isn’t high on his list of his priorities. We both love the outdoors, so I’d consider a mountain resort where we can do a lot of hiking and take cool pictures, if the cruise doesn’t work out.

March 6. I’ve worked the past 3 weekends but am NOT working this weekend. I physically can’t keep this up, although I’ll probably be working the following weekend. This is crazy, don’t they know I have a wedding to plan?!

Still looking for a dress. I haven’t seen anything in the stores that I like so I’ll probably make one of my own, but I haven’t decided on the pattern or the material. I’ve been saying I’m not wearing white, but I *might* make a white mid-calf length dress and make a wrap to go around the shoulders, out of a colored/patterned fabric. The fabric I got for Jodie’s dress is real pretty (pink chiffon with purple-pink butterflies that look like they were water-painted on) so I might even make my own dress out of it. We found shirts for the guys at JCPenney. Joe wants his Navy buddy Matt to be his best man; I told him I don’t think I could choose a maid of honor. Out of 3 sisters, I couldn’t choose just one. And I’ve got girl-friends, but I’m not really close enough to any of them to ask them to be my maid (or matron) of honor. I’m going to have Joe’s kids stand with him, and Nathan stand with me.

I’ve extended our date to the end of May, after the kids are out of school. I would love to marry Joe amongst the azaleas in Muskogee in April. Honor Heights Park is so lovely that time of year. But, Joe’s kids go to a different school district than what Nathan and I live in, and it wouldn’t make sense to move them to a different school with only a month left in the school year. Also, it wouldn’t make sense for him and his kids to live 30 minutes away from us, after we get married. I can see it: Yeah, we’re married but living separately. Nope, it would probably be best to wait until the kids are out of school.

March 23. Wedding plans are coming along, slowly but surely. I want an outdoor wedding, so Sheila and I checked out the Rose Gardens at Will Rogers Park Thursday. We got ideas of how we want to set up the chairs, reception tables, etc. I’ve got most of the music decided on, but still need to pick a piece for the recessional. The guys are outfitted already, except for John and Nathan – I want to wait before buying them new shoes or pants because they are at the age where they can grow a lot in a short time.  I was going to make Jodie’s dress myself but I think I’ll ask a lady here at work if she can make it. One less thing for me to worry about, you know.

March 25. I went ahead and reserved the Rose Gardens for Sunday, May 31. Just 2 months away! Melissa asked me if I’m ready to get the wedding over with! I’m really not in a hurry – there is just so much to do! One of those is to get a minister. Sheila has a friend who is licensed to do weddings but is not really a religious minister. His church is more like a Life church or Community church. So, I don’t know. There wouldn’t be anything wrong with someone like that marrying us, and it’s not like we follow any religion anyway. All I really want is someone who can say, “Do you, do you, I pronounce you.”  I wonder if he would read some scriptures for us.

 

March 30. I was kinda looking forward to seeing Elaine’s boys again when she comes out, but I had a real good feeling she wouldn’t bring them! I figured she’d take this opportunity to do something on her own, and get a short vacation from her 3 darling little boys whom she dearly loves but can be a handful.

I think we’ll just have the rehearsal at my house, Saturday evening, in the backyard, and probably go eat at Bad Brad’s BBQ afterward. It’s a small side-of-the-road bbq place, and has the BEST brisket ever. Locally owned. There are 3 in Oklahoma and 1 in Texas. It’s got a real western, small-town décor. We were eating there once, and Jodie asked where the restrooms are. I pointed around the corner. She headed that direction and came back 10 seconds or later. “Bulls or heifers?” she asked. I am still laughing about that one.

Little by little, everything is coming together. Joe and I went to Hobby Lobby and Garden Ridge Saturday and got tons of flowers, ivy, plastic plates, and cups. Both places had their flowers 50% off. So we got some great deals! I looked at cakes at a grocery store in Yukon. The one I liked the best was $300 and served at least 120. Don’t need one that big! Also we’re getting our house ready to sell….

April 13. Friday Joe and I got our cake ordered from a place at May and 63^rd called Sweete Memories. It’ll be a 2-tier, lemon with raspberry filling. YUM.  We got to sample 5 or 6 varieties and the lemon raspberry was by far my favorite. I think I’ll put Elaine in charge of the cake. I need someone who has a creative eye and won’t be all nervous and shaky and high-strung like I probably will be! I’ve already told her about it – we have to pick up the cake on Saturday and keep it refrigerated; it will be in  2 pieces so we’ll have to put the top layer on ourselves. And, I’m wanting both tiers topped with flowers. We’ll also have to do that ourselves. It was only $150 and we’re not having a groom’s cake. The wedding is going to be so inexpensive (thank goodness). Nice, but inexpensive.

April 23. My friend Rebecca asked me if I was getting cold feet. No, not getting “cold feet” per se, but it is weird to think of myself as being married to someone again. Joe and I have been together about the same amount of time that my first husband and I were together before getting married, and we now know how that turned out. So I hope I’m not being too hasty this time…. No, don’t think so. Joe definitely wants to be with me and has already committed himself to me, whereas with my first husband, I felt like a convenience more than anything. Totally different scenario.

April 29. I finally found a dress that I’m happy with! I looked at about 20 different dresses at different stores; some white, some magenta, some pink, some solid, some printed…but I finally settled with one I found at Dillard’s, a white satiny, summery dress. I’m still going to have to shed a few pounds so I won’t look like a cow in it though. A month to go… Probably in a couple weeks it’ll hit me and I’ll start freaking out getting last minute stuff done!

May 1. Ugh! 30 days and counting, and I found out yesterday that we can’t have the reception at the Rose Gardens! Seems they gave me a list of rules and regs when I reserved it but all I remember is throwing in the floorboard of my car and never really reading it. So this news came last night. Shame on me.

SO – we are exploring other options, and may even have the wedding itself in a separate location. I mean really, why spend a lot of time decorating a place that is only going to be used for 30 minutes? Thankfully the invitations have not been sent out yet.

And I actually never did read the rules and regs. I don’t even know where that sheet is now. It was Sheila who met with the lady who is in charge of renting the Rose Garden, and Shel was asking about garbage cans. The lady was like, What do you need garbage cans for? Shel said for the reception. That’s when the lady said that you can’t have a reception at the Rose Garden, and that every bride is told that upon renting the facility. I thought they could have been a bit more vocal about it, such as specifically pointing it out. They ought to put it on the website and make it more clear.

Oh well, I’m glad I found out now. Something will turn up. I’m getting a wee bit stressed but as I’ve told Joe, this wedding cannot be characterized by stress. My first one was horrendously stressful because, well, various reasons, and I always swore I would never go thru that again. It was not a happy time in my life. So that’s why I’ve been kind of ho-hum, la-te-da about this one! I want it to be relaxed and fun!

May 4. Less than 4 weeks to go.  The park has a picnic shelter, called the South Pavilion, which we can rent for the reception, and IT HAS RESTROOMS. The Rose Gardens themselves have no facilities nearby.  Joe and I were out walking around the park Saturday --- I’ve lived in OKC for nearly 15 years, and never knew what a nice park it is. The only 2 parts of the park I’d even seen or been to were the Tennis Center, back in my tennis days, and the Amphitheater, when I’d go to the Twilight Concerts during the summer. But besides the Rose Gardens (which are starting to bloom) they have a beautiful Iris Garden. They have irises in about 100 different colors. There is an aquatic center, another picnic shelter besides the South Pavilion, and lots of shade trees and green lawn and picnic tables. I found a picnic area secluded under these huge shade trees which was soooo peaceful. I told Joe I wanted to stay there all day (without the kids, of course) and just let the stress melt from my body.

Invitations will need to be sent out soon.

May 14. It’s getting down to the wire! 16 days to go. Plans are coming along. I’m glad I’ve had Sheila to help. Honestly I had my doubts for a while; although she isn’t working an 8-5 job, she still keeps very busy and seems to be pulled in a lot of directions. So for a while we were doubting if she really had the time to devote to the wedding. But – things are coming together. Joe and I went to the courthouse today to get our license, and they said the first day we could get it is May 22, next Friday. I wonder why that is. We had also gone to the VA hospital (where Joe gets medical care for free) to get blood tests, and they told us that Oklahoma hadn’t required blood tests in several years. We didn’t know that! So I took extra time for lunch and accomplished nothing!

May 26. 5 more days, and I’ll be a married woman again. Jill, my friend from work, had asked me if I’m getting nervous yet. My sister in law, Kim, asked me if I was getting the pre-wedding jitters, and one of my co-workers asked if I was getting cold feet.  It’s weird. Strange as it seems, I’m not nervous or jittery at all. Just taking it a day at a time!

Sometimes I ask Joe, “Are you SURE you want to marry me? Are you really sure?” and he’ll ask me, “Are you sure you can put up with me the rest of  your life?” to which I respond, “Just don’t piss me off!”

I finally had an extra day off (Memorial Day). I finally got rested up, and we got so much done. Saturday it was nearly noon before I woke up! It was after 11 to be sure. I had dreamed about Joe cheating on me. There was this young, trailer-trash blonde single mom with 2 young kids that, he was helping around the house. I was there for Thanksgiving dinner… eventually several other people (family) showed up, as did Joe. I hardly saw him all day but when I did, the blonde was “buddying up” with him. I could tell she was hitting on him and was working up to go in for the kill. Finally I was looking all over the house for him, and I was just sure he was either with her in her bedroom, or taking a shower with her. I found them in the shower together. When I found them she defensively put her arms around him. I was yelling and cussing at him, and threw the engagement ring at him. “How could you do this to me?” I yelled.  “You’re my fiancé! Well, not any more you’re not.”

 He assured me that would NEVER happen!

This Used to be a Starbucks

May 27, 2009

Joe and I go places. On a Saturday we might drive east on I-40 to the Base Exchange in Midwest City. Or, you might find us on the Southside, browsing Uptown Bargains or FYE For Your Entertainment at I-240 and Penn. On a Sunday we might visit his mother in Del City after she gets home from church. And before we go home, we might pick up a late lunch or an early dinner.

But no matter where we go, we are bound to come across a building that was obviously an old department store at one time, but is now something else. Sometimes the building is subdivided into smaller shops or restaurants. And Joe will inevitably exclaim, “That used to be a TG&Y!”  TG&Y Stores began their financial downturn in the 1980s and finally breathed their last in 2002.

Like last weekend. We were driving around town, going somewhere, who knows where. We must have been on the Southside, on I-240 about Penn or Western, because we drove by a sort of strip-mall. The single building stretches nearly a quarter-mile, but is divvied up into several smaller retailers: Mazzio’s Pizza on one end, Hancock Fabrics and Dollar Tree in the middle,   “I remember when that was a TG&Y! This side was the furniture department, over there were the toys, and here was the children’s clothing section. My mom took me here so many times I could have found my way around blindfolded!”

Having grown up in Oklahoma City where the chain was headquartered, Joe has lots of memories of shopping at TG&Y. It was a staple of his childhood. I can’t count the number of times Joe has said, “That used to be a TG&Y!” Of course, I have to remind him that not EVERYTHING used to be a TG&Y.

Joe and I muse between ourselves, what common stores or restaurants that you see in every town now, will be obsolete by the time our kids have families of their own?

Starbucks, for one. Coffee shops came into vogue in the mid-late 1990s (think Cafe Nervosa of Frasier, and Central Perk of Friends), and Starbucks became the hangout of choice for the in-crowd. Oh, if you went to Starbucks, or were seen carrying a Starbucks cup, you were SOMEBODY. As a result of their popularity, Starbucks could charge ridiculous amounts of money for their coffees, and people would pay it, just to say “I got this at Starbucks.”

When the recession hit, a $5 cup of coffee became a luxury. Spending that much on a cup of coffee became ludicrous and unfashionable. Enter McDonald’s. McDonald’s capitalized on this and started pushing their McCafe line more than ever (the chain was founded in 1993 and was introduced in the US in 2001). The McCafe menu offers mochas, lattes, cappuccinos, and other coffee drinks, for a much lower price, too. Smart move, McDonald’s! Billboards everywhere began advertising the new McCafe: “Coffeehouse mocha with a shot of reality.” SLAM on Starbucks! 

And don’t forget Dunkin’ Donuts! In 2007, the Massachusetts-based coffee & donut shop started grabbing market share from Starbucks with ad campaigns making fun of Starbucks’ “Fretalian” menu. “Is it French? Or is it Italian?” “Delicious lattes from Dunkin' Donuts. You order them in English.”

Starbucks is still King, for now. But they’ll fade out one day, just like TG&Y did. And one day, 30 years from now, our kids will be driving around town with their kids, saying, “I remember when that used to be a Starbucks.”

Carpet Business From the Ground Up

May 4, 2009

Dalton. The Carpet Capital of the World. Every friend and classmate I ever knew while growing up was raised on the carpet industry in one way or another. From the plant worker to the business owner, we all shared the culture. The town even had an entire vernacular all its own. We were saying words like jute, cut loop, tuftin’, finishin’, hyster, before we could even say the alphabet. As for myself, I can still smell the chemical scent of new carpet.

Dad and his business partner owned Alpha Carpets for as long as I can possibly remember. I remember his light-blue Chevrolet pickup, with “Alpha Carpets” printed on the side. I remember rolls of carpet stored in the basement – my siblings and I were playing on them once and boy, did we get a whipping. With Daddy’s belt – more dreaded than Momma’s flyswat or hickory stick.

And I remember going to work with Daddy one January morning when Mom was in the hospital having my youngest sister, Melissa. It was COLD. I remember the four of us – Dad, his business partner Joe, my sister Sabrina, and myself -- standing in the office around a space heater. That must have been his first building, off Chatsworth Highway near Welcome Hill church, behind Pye Nissan.

My dad grew up in the small rural town of Murphy, NC, in the southeast corner of the state near the Georgia state line. My mom grew up in the small rural town of Titusville, PA, in the northwest corner of the state near Lake Erie and the border of Ohio. They met at a skating rink in Cleveland, Ohio, in the 1950s. Their two sons were born in Titusville; their first daughter was born in Murphy. Finally the family settled in the small rural town of Rocky Face, GA, and raised three more daughters.

So how did my parents get from Murphy to Dalton? How did my Dad come to own his own business? Well, like everything, there’s a story behind it.

Daddy learned the carpet business from the ground up, much like I learned the accounting industry. There was no work in Murphy, a town of less than 2,000 even today. The tufted textile industry was sprouting in Dalton in the 1950s, having branched off from the chenille bedspread industry (the history of which is a whole other story in itself). Dalton was less than 90 miles from Murphy, within a 2-hour jaunt west on US-64 and south on GA-71. And this bourgeoning industry needed workers. Lots of ‘em.

So Dad took his first job in the carpet industry, cutting rugs at Lawtex Finishing. After mastering the task of cutting rugs, he moved to the foam machine, or the coater. The year was 1961.

Dad stayed in Dalton during the work week; Mom and the kids stayed in Murphy at the home of a family-friend, waiting for Dad to come home on weekends. He rented a room at the Cavender House near Glenwood and Murray Avenues for $7/week. The Cavender House must have been a boarding house for men; Dad said five other guys lived there, sharing a kitchen and two bathrooms. He stayed there for nearly a year.

Finally he had enough money saved up to move the family to Dalton. They rented a new-but-unfinished house on Cavender Road, on the southside of Dalton (now off the South Bypass). Dad worked at Lawtex for 3 years.

Now, I always knew that we were living at what my folks called “the old house” when I was born, and I remember mom talking about “Mrs. Harlan,” an elderly lady who lived alone off Houston Valley Road, just a few miles from our house in Rocky Face. What I didn’t know was, how my parents got from the house in south Dalton on Cavender Road, to “the old house,” 15 miles west on the other side of Rocky Face Mountain, and what the Harlans had to do with any of it. Well, now I know.

Dad was working the day shift at Lawtex, when his boss had him switch with a night-shift guy. On the night shift he met a fellow named Vince Harlan, whose mother had a house for rent in Rocky Face. Dad said they rented the house “for free” – apparently the Harlans never charged them rent. Vince Harlan’s mother was Mrs. Clara Harlan, the lady whom all my life I knew only as “Mrs. Harlan.”

After three years’ employment at Lawtex, Dad went to work at Dalton Carpet Industries. His boss was Kurt Rosenbaum, whose son was Frank. Frank Rosenbaum started Southland Carpets in 1966, offering Dad the job of Plant Supervisor. After a time, Frank, Dad, and two other fellows from Southland, started Caprice Carpets. Dad and one of those men, Joe Kinsey, incorporated Alpha Carpets in June 1971.

Although I was too young to remember much about their first building (the cold one where we stood around the space heater), I can see the Grace Street building clear as day in my head. It was a white metal warehouse-type building with dark green vertical stripes, just south of South Thornton Avenue. The business expanded and in 1976 Alpha Carpets moved to a larger building on Chatsworth Highway. Daddy would take us kids with him sometimes when he had to do some extra work in the evening after dinner. I even remember the phone number; how could I ever forget? I must have called it a thousand times at Mom’s mandate, asking him to bring home an extra gallon of milk or something from the grocery store.

And that’s how my dad built his business from the ground up. Alpha Carpets enjoyed astonishing success throughout the 1970s and 1980s. Dad retired sometime in the 1990s. A handful of large carpet mills – the largest in the world, in fact – eventually ate up the little guys, and Alpha Carpets just couldn’t survive. What’s more, the Crash of 2008 and ensuing recession hit the carpet industry pretty hard, causing rampant unemployment.

My parents moved out of “the old house” in 1968, into a new brick home in a new neighborhood in Rocky Face. We kids have long since moved out and are raising families of our own, but Mom and Dad still live there. They celebrated their 50th wedding anniversary last September.

Under The Canopy

April 26, 2009

The April sky is heavy and gray with rain clouds and the wind is blowing fiercely. Trees are thick and green with spring but the branches thrash wildly in the wind. The wind and the clouds mean rain will come soon. Typical for this time of year. Tornado season has begun.

It’s called the Rite of Spring in Oklahoma City. No, not tornado season! Although I wouldn’t argue with that assessment either. I’m talking about the annual Festival of the Arts! We don’t miss the Arts Fest. It’s my favorite event and a big part of what I love about downtown OKC. Football – Sooners, Cowboys, Bedlam, Red River Shootout – is what excites most people here in the state. Not Joe and me! It’s the Arts Festival we look forward to each year.

It’s Sunday afternoon and I’m writing this from a table on the 2nd floor of the library in Downtown OKC, overlooking Park and Hudson Avenues. I can see the Museum of Art from where I’m sitting. Leadership Square is behind us. Downtown Oklahoma City is a community all its own. Tall grey buildings. Concrete sidewalks. The Conncourse. Denizens scurrying back and forth between buildings and cars. Government buildings, office buildings. Parking garages, parking meters. And each spring the Festival of the Arts brings new life and excitement to it all.

Probably the main draw at the Arts Fest is International Food Row. It’s always the first place we visit, as we did yesterday. 25 or so local restaurants host food booths; each booth partners with an art venue in town. The kids were each allowed to get one “real” food, and one dessert. And there’s so much to choose from! Nathan got a slice of cheese pizza from Sammy’s Pizza & Prairie Dance Theater; Jodie got smoked ribs from Brewer Entertainment & [Artspace] at Untitled; John got a gyro from PaPa’s Greek Foods and Allied Arts Foundation; Joe got a bratwurst from Made 2 Grill & OKC Zoological Park and Botanical Garden; and I got a brisket baked potato from Sweet Corn Express & Oklahoma History Center.

The place is crowded and the lines can be long. Seriously, the 6-day festival boasts 750,000 visitors in all. That’s over 100,000 on any given day, and it wouldn’t surprise me at all if there were 500 or more festival-goers in the food court at any given time. But the food is always worth the wait.

The day was warm and muggy, but we hardly noticed it as spring breezes filtered the air. The five of us found a shady patch of soft grass among the trees at the Botanical Gardens to sit and eat. John and Nathan, having already finished their lunches, skimmed back by the food booths in quest for funnel cakes for dessert. I kept seeing other festival-goers nibbling on fruit kabobs. Chunks of pineapple, banana, and strawberry were skewered on a stick and drizzled with chocolate sauce. They looked scrumptious! I mean really, how can you go wrong with FRUIT and CHOCOLATE, two of nature’s most delectable offerings? As soon as I finished my brisket potato I had to have one!

Hmm, ahh, um, actually, it wasn’t as good as it looked. That’s OK; you never know til ya try, right? Joe and Jodie each picked up a Strawberries Newport for their dessert. Flaky pastries are covered with a rich vanilla pudding, then topped with fresh strawberries and whipped cream. Yum. No wonder it’s a perennial favorite.

After filling our tummies with that awesome festival food, Joe, the kids, and I walked around to look at the 100 or so art booths. Artisans from around the country proudly displayed their paintings, pottery, sculptures. Artwork of every design and genre could be found. I bought one this year, a print of a painting by Keith Andry from Baton Rouge, LA. I’ve admired his work for many years, but during most of that time I was a single mom living on a solitary income and paying off debts. I couldn’t afford to spend $50 on such a luxury as a painting or sculpture or ceramic work. Thankfully now I’m in a much better place and can appreciate and support the Arts.

Music of all tunes and tempos floated through the air as bands played on the sound stages throughout the park. We strolled around the pond at the Botanical Gardens. Once at the top, Joe and I let the kiddos join other kids in rolling down the hill back toward the pond. Down, down, down they rolled! It always seems to be the kids’ favorite part.

Meanwhile Joe and I lay in the soft, thick grass under the shade of the trees, gazing up at the blue spring sky. It was peaceful. The smells of roast brisket and deep-fried funnel cakes floated through the air. Young children giggled and yelped with playful excitement against the background of music playing on the Water Stage.

Food, art, and music, all under the canopy of springtime in Oklahoma. So much excitement, so much to see and do at the Festival of the Arts!

Our Latest Adventure - Looking for a House

March 26, 2009

Now that our family is expanding, we’re going to need a bigger house! Joe and I are going to be married soon, and all five of us sure can’t live in the house I bought for Nathan and myself in 2002. This house has 3 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms, and a 2-car garage, but the kitchen is small and narrow. It was like a castle after leaving that 750 square foot, 1-bedroom apartment we rented for a year, although our home now is barely 1300 square feet.

Joe and I have been looking at new homes for a few months now already, and we finally found one that could really work for us. We looked at it last Thursday evening, and we love how well the owners have kept it up, inside and out. It’s a 4-bedroom, 3-bath, about 2100 sq ft, built in 1983, on Elk Run. The home appears to be owned by a couple with 3 young kids. They have bunkbeds for the boys in one room, and an adorable baby room for the girl. The 4th bedroom is set up as a weight room.

The interior décor is very updated, very modern. Nice spacious livingroom, and lots of counter space in the kitchen. And, I really like the neighborhood. It’s a lot more settled and homey than some of the newer additions. Asking price is $182,900; of course we’ll have to get my house ready to sell too. According to Zillow.com, my home is worth $137,000 – although I seriously doubt we’ll get that much for it. Whatever we sell it for, I’m hoping to net in the ballpark of $30K from it. And, we’re wanting our payments to be in the range of $1,200 - $1,600/month. We shall see.

Before Christmas we found one on Platt Drive that we absolutely LOVED. Also in an older, more settled neighborhood, it’s 2200 sq ft and was built in 1981. The asking price was just $160,000, which is well within our budget. The couple selling it have lived there for 17 years and have raised 3 children who are now all married. Overall the house seems to have been kept up really well for being nearly 30 years old. The interior décor is lovely. There’s a good sized backyard, a nice pack patio, and a deck off the 2nd floor. We loved it so much that we had already started thinking how to arrange the furniture! But, it was just the first house we’d looked at so we decided not put all our eggs in one basket.

As much as we could have moved right in that very day, we don’t want our kids to have to change schools, and moving into this home would have required Nathan and Jodie to go to a different middle school.

In early February Joe and I walked over to 46th Street to look at a house for sale. At initial inspection the house already had one strike against it: we didn’t care for the small, corner back patio. But we were willing to give it a chance…until we saw the backyard. It sloped steeply downhill, a feature we didn’t like at all. So we struck that one off our list.

A week or so later on a Sunday, Joe, the kids, and I looked at a few houses after I got home from working overtime at the office. Joe met his realtor, a very sweet Vietnamese lady by the name of Mai, when he was looking for a house on his own before he met me. She emails him listings of homes on the market that match our criteria: Yukon schools, 4 bedroom, 3-car garage, 2000 square feet or more. And you know, although our nation is in a housing and mortgage crisis, it is true what they say that Oklahoma has not been hit nearly as hard as the rest of the nation. Yukon, anyway, has LOTS of homes up for sale. I’m surprised just how many meet our criteria; what we want is pretty narrow, especially the location.

So on this particular day, we had a list of 5 or 6 homes that we wanted to look at. One was on Derail Street. Derail Street? Really? A new neighborhood is going up just west of Garth Brooks Blvd. on Hwy. 66, and the streets are named for “railroad” words. One is Derail. Who would want to live on a street named after a potentially deadly disaster? And one is Hobo Street. Isn’t that a little derogatory? Isn’t “hobo” a politically incorrect word for a homeless drifter? Who thinks of these names??

We drove up 36th Street to view a home in the Sunrise Hills addition. It had just gone on the market so I guess the owners weren’t quite ready to show it. It was beige brick on a corner lot, was about all we could tell. We couldn’t go in; all we could do was drive by. But just looking at the exterior, I wasn’t very impressed.

Then we drove south on Mustang Road to 10th Street to look at a few in Drakestone. Neither of the two from our list on Ellsworth had “for sale” signs out; 613 Ellsworth for SURE didn’t look like it was on the market. So Joe, being the bold guy he is, went and knocked on the door to speak with the resident. Turns out, the resident is RENTING the home on a contract that wouldn’t expire until June or July. He was appalled that the owner would have the home on the market when he was on a contract, paying $1600 a month, at that. Same with 617 Ellsworth, only they are renting month-to-month. So that was 2 homes scratched off the list.

We drove around the neighborhood to 5th Street to view another home. It, too, did not have a “for sale” sign out front. So we surmised that the home might be being rented out also.

Then it was north on Mustang and back down 36th Street to Lakeview Estates to a home on 39th Street. This one was another “cookie cutter” house similar to the one we’re in now, only much larger. We liked what we saw on the outside but couldn’t go in. Joe said we’d have to have Mai show us inside this one.

Mai came over last night to look our home over and give us ideas as to how to make it more saleable. We’d sure like to buy the one on Elk Run so naturally we have to get our house ready to sell too. She said our light fixtures were outdated. Huh?! The house is 6 years old, and it’s outdated?! That blew me away. She said anything with gold plating looks “nineties.”

So we will need to put in some new light fixtures. She also said that ceiling fans are a big selling point, and the only one we have is in the livingroom. Joe said it’s no problem to install some of those. She was a little concerned with the paint color in the livingroom (mauve/plum)…and she said to take down all family pictures, because people want to see themselves in the house, not someone else.

Aside from that, she said that mainly we needed to de-clutter. We bought about 20, 18” x 18” x 18" boxes last weekend and I’ve gotten 4 boxes packed so far. She was looking throughout all the rooms in our house, and said a couple times, “You need a bigger house!” to which I responded with, “That’s what you’re here for!”

She asked, “So, do you think you’ll be ready in a couple weeks?” Meaning, to show the house. And my thoughts were, 2 weeks, no friggin’ way. A month MAYBE. We do have jobs. Joe and I both work full time, and it’s not like we have nothing to do but pack and clean.

And we do have a wedding to plan. Mai is estimating a selling price of $115,000. I was hoping for $120,000, but $115K is already at $90/sq ft. That’s about average for the market here in Yukon. So after fees and commission and other costs, at that price we’ll profit about $20,000. Not as much as I was hoping for, but of course, any profit from the sale will go towards the new house. Our worry now is, will we lose the house we want while trying to get ours sold?

I Want a Life....

March 10, 2009

I want a life…. Where I can enjoy a quiet morning, a soft spring rainfall, a silent snowfall. I want a life….where I’m not chained to a desk or an office. I want a life….where I can take as long as I need to take a walk, ride my bike, or even drop by the cleaners or run other errands here in YUKON and not have to be half a state away from home. I want a life…that isn’t wasted on rush hour traffic.

I want a life…where I can sleep when I want & need to, and not have to depend on caffeine to get me thru the morning or afternoon. I want a life…where I can take time off to travel, hike, or camp. I want a life….where I can spend more time tutoring or teaching Nathan, or doing art-craft projects, or whatever. I want a life….where I can use my creativity more freely.

This has been my 10th busy season as an accountant. I like my job, I like what I do, I just wish I could have more flexibility. This busy season has been especially rough, since Kassie left for another job. She was one of our key year-end people. She’s been here for 4 years and has a wealth of knowledge and experience! The rest of the staff has stayed mega-busy being sure we gleaned all the information we could from her.

Monday, January 19, was the Martin Luther King Holiday, and I was allowed to work from home. It was fantastic to not have to be up at a certain time, waste time on the freeway, be chained to a desk or office, and be able to throw a load of laundry in the wash or fix the kids something quick for lunch – and still get my work done. I only got 3 hours’ worth of work in, but it was all I needed. It was so much more relaxed and convenient and I was certainly no less productive.

I had thought I’d see if I can work from home more often. But after conferring with Human Resources and the President of the company, our Division Director announced that we could no longer work from home. Huh?! Why?! I could be so much more relaxed and therefore so much more productive, not having to rush around every morning trying to beat the clock. Heck, by the time I get to work at 8:30 I’m ready for a break.

An ice storm blew in the last week January – a massive storm unusual for Oklahoma. Monday we were sent home from the office at 2:00. Well, that’s the time I usually start getting drowsy, so I looked forward to getting home and taking a nap. It took me 20 minutes to get the car warmed up and scrape the ice off. I hadn’t realized how bad the ice was already. Driving was slow; I took Reno rather than I-40 for added caution. I got to the Middle School a little after 3:00, and met Nathan on his way to walk to Granny’s. I flagged him over and he jumped in the car. At home I made us bowls of hot, buttery, brown-sugary oatmeal. Yum, yum.

The office was closed again Tuesday as were the schools. I finally had time to work on year-end financials for the Homeowners’ Association. I worked on it starting about 1:00 for 5 hours – I was so absorbed that Nathan had to ask me “when’s dinner” at 6:30 – and finally got all the income and expenses balanced and reconciled and in a readable format.

It was GREAT to be able to work at my own pace, when I can be most productive – like on the MLK Holiday. So I’m getting tastes, here and there, of what it is like to work at home on my own schedule. It is NICE. Plus it felt good to have some time off, without the guilt. I hardly yawned all afternoon – normally I yawn constantly. I get so tired of yawning all the time; wouldn’t it be simpler if I could just get enough sleep in the first place?

Wednesday, surprisingly, the schools and state agencies were closed again. By then I was getting cabin fever, so I ventured out around town, doing a few errands, picking up a few groceries. The streets weren’t bad at all; the main roads had been cleared out. Joe came over, we had spaghetti for dinner, we watched The Great Gatsby on DVD (which I STILL don’t understand much more than I ever did), and called it a night.

It was wonderful to finally get enough sleep. I wonder how much more I could accomplish, if I could sleep or nap when I NEEDED to.

February is always our knock-down drag-out month, and I would get so sick with stress that I hardly knew what day it was sometimes. And this busy season was compounded by having one less person. Besides that, I’ve taken on many of Kassie’s job responsibilities, and doing so at a critical time. It’s wearing me out, but it won’t be for much longer.

For most of the month, I did little else than audit work. That is, preparing schedules and analyses for our independent CPA auditors. I had to come in 7 hours the first weekend just to get the normal month-end work done. And it was 5 hours at the office each of the other three weekends to work on our annual reports and filings.

It’s funny – when I tell people (especially my family) that this is “our busy season,” they respond with something like, “Oh yeah, tax season.” I don’t do taxes! I haven’t done taxes in 8 years! I don’t think they know what I do. I’m a statutory accountant, I do insurance accounting, and our big annual deadline is March 1.

And March 1 did finally come around. The worst of the deadlines were finally over; we finished the annual state filings and reports about noon the day they were due. By then my brain was little more than mush. It’s amazing I’ve made through this whole stressful season, without getting sick or having to take some time off. Often I would get ill in my stomach from all the nerves, like I was going to throw up. One pressure-filled weekend I thought I was going to have a stroke or something from the stress.

The Dow dropped below 7000 yesterday, and is 6822 right now. It’s down to 1996 levels. It’s unbelievable; I really didn’t think it would get below 8000.

Finally, it’s mid-March, I’m feeling much more relaxed. Most of the pressure is off now. Still a little, but nothing like it was.